October 17, 2000

Keyboard Courtesy
From Emily Post to e-post: New rules for polite correspondence

Mitchel Raphael
National Post

The other day, I was stopped cold in cyberspace by the e-mail police. I had received a group e-mail from an academic acquaintance in New York alerting me to a new book. Just as my nosy eyes were looking at the cc list of fellow recipients, one of those exclamation marked e-mails -- which are never really that important -- arrived from one Csky.

It was addressed to the original sender: "I don't know who you are or how you got my e-mail address, but here are some e-mail etiquette tips for you and everyone that you just sent that e-mail to."

Who was this Miss Manners of cyber-space who told us cc'ed folks to: "Save this and pass it along to promote good netiquette."

Csky, it turns out, is Cinnamon Sky, a name she gave herself 10 years ago. She lives in Sausalito, California (big surprise), a small town in the San Francisco Bay area. She's presently an independent Internet consultant who, amongst other E-business work, teaches a course on e-mail use and etiquette.

She has taught one-day courses for five hours or other sessions that take place over a longer period. She teaches groups in offices or individuals in their homes. "I saw the need for it," says Sky, over the phone.

Sky, the Emily Post of e-mail, has three major pet peeves. The first is people not using the bcc field. Bcc stands for blind carbon copy. This allows people to send a group e-mail without divulging the names of the other recipients. In many cases, it's simply a matter of clicking on the bcc box so it appears as a permanent option on outgoing e-mails.

"Please -- EVERYONE on this list," Sky noted in that first e-mail, "I request that each of us respect the PRIVACY of others on the list we were just included in, and do NOT copy that list of addresses into your address book for ANY purpose. (This is how lists are formed and sold by junk mail companies, who sell CDs of our addresses for $$)."

The second most common offence, says Sky, also noted in that e-mail violation notice, is people forwarding and not cleaning up e-mails.

"When forwarding a message (if you feel it important enough that you must), then PLEASE take the time to select and delete all the extra e-mail addresses etc. (the headers) at the top of the e-mail, and all the extra >>>>> before each line! If you think the message is that important to share with us, then it is certainly important enough to clean up for us!"

"I personally don't take the time to go searching for the message buried in e-mails with long headers and lots of >>>>>. I am sure most of us will delete e-mails that look like that -- without a blink."

But the most egregious offence of all "are the people typing in all caps. Those are the worst e-mails."

So how often does Sky give e-mail slobs a cyber whipping?

"Whenever I get on a cc list I try to respond by sending out the little tutorial," she says. "Then I bcc everyone else on the cc list."

She says the responses she gets from her policing e-mail can be extreme. The angry ones, "we call those flames, they think I just sent them SPAM." Spam is basically unsolicited junk e-mail sent out on large mailing lists. Sky has also "gotten positive feedback and a few questions."

She is happy to dish out the advice. "If anyone has a question about how to use bcc, go ahead and ask me, as different software has different ways of handling it."

So what about those annoying lists you get stuck on that tell you to e-mail another address if you want to be removed from the list? "Don't believe it," she says. "By replying to that, you're letting the spammer know you are an active e-mail. If you ignore it, you're more apt not to remain on a spammer's list. That's their way of validating you are a live address." However, Sky notes, if it's a company from which you've made a purchase, they will often take you off their list at your request.

Sky's other e-mail etiquette tips include the following:

- If you reply to an e-mail, do not bury the reply in the text. If you are putting your answers to queries throughout the e-mail, leave a space between their original text and your response.

- Check with people to see if they can receive e-mails that are html formatted. Html means it looks like a Web page and has bolding and different fonts. Otherwise, send plain text so the recipient can read it.

- Ask people first if they want to receive attachments. Some people can't open them, while others fear potential viruses, or prefer plain text.

- Keep it personal. If you must forward that joke, don't just pass it on. Sky says add your own note.

- Make subject fields relevant. An intense e-mail exchange can start with "Budget Report" as the subject and then 20 e-mails later it's all about whether you are going to that fetish fashion show. Make sure the subject matches any new e-mail. Sky says that because some people archive their e-mail, correct subject heads allow for quicker retrieval.

"But the most important thing of all," Sky says, "is for people to understand that e-mail is not private. It could be read by anyone. It could wind up in the email box of anyone else on your server, or even at a different domain. It could be misaddressed. Do you really want some neighbor to know about your hot date?"

With all this e-mail etiquette business, one can't help but wonder: Wouldn't it be quicker just to write a letter?